How to avoid dating cheaters
We were shocked when we heard that the first guy Rihanna seriously dated after Chris Brown had been accused of domestic abuse by an ex-girlfriend.After everything she went through, it would seem as if she'd be repulsed by men with that kind of reputation. "Most of us have a relationship pattern — that same type of guy we keep falling for — and it can work for or against us," says couples therapist Deborah Dunn, author of Stupid About Men.Women in these toxic patterns get hooked on the ups and downs of their relationships and can form what experts call betrayal bonds, which cause them to feel even more attached to men who show them these extreme — and sometimes ultimately dangerous — forms of attention."You eventually feel like a guy doesn't love you unless he's either yelling in your face or trying to win you back," Dunn says.In other cases, as you mentioned, people who are already married or in a committed relationship will sign up for an online dating site in order to pursue a second (or even third or fourth) relationship on the side.
"It's also OK to give input on the frequency of nights out, as well as how late your partner stays out.
But, "for couples with too many boys' or girls' nights out, rules need to be discussed and boundaries set in place," says therapist Irina Firstein, LCSW.
Sure, you don't want to come off as possessive or come between your guy and his friends, but that doesn't mean he isn't crossing a line with the time he's spending with them. If it's making you uncomfortable, it's worth a discussion.
And as it’s articulated in an article about how to spot a cheater, “communication and the willingness to be an open book are two of the most important indicators of a happy and successful relationship.” They’re also indicators that he’s honest and likely not a cheater. It’s also an indicator that you might have a problem connecting, either emotionally or physically (or both) to your partner.
Pay close attention here, because there’s an important distinction to be made. It’s something you should deal with regardless of suspicion of cheating.I don't want to waste my time with that kind of nonsense!How can I pursue online dating but be sure that I won't be fooled by a serial cheater?"It's not uncommon for women to keep going back to the type that wronged them in the past." How do you change whom you're drawn to dating?